What are you afraid of?

So I’m on this whole ‘do-what-scares-me’ thing and I realized it is stressing me out.

I don’t want to get in to too many details, but for the last week or so I’ve been thinking about doing this one particular thing that scares the shit out of me. I’m going through all the scenarios, preparing myself for the worst, and considering alternate options… but it doesn’t do any good for my blood pressure.

But this really scares me. My chest feels like there’s a little person inside blowing a balloon way too big. This is the feeling I’m trying to convince myself is “good”, and “proves I’m alive”, but if I do much more of this, I’ll probably live a very short life.

The More Things Change…

I’ve been avoiding my blog.

When we last left off, I was waiting to hear if I got in to Centennial’s Corporate Communications program. I consider the weeks I’ve been away to be one long commercial break.

To make a long story short, while I was waiting to hear about Centennial I got a great job at a newswire company… so I won’t be going to Centennial in September–or in January. What can I say? I heard strange new words like ’salary’, ‘benefits’, and ‘paid vacation’ and I was hooked.

I’ll probably go back to school some day, but not now. I’d rather get in a classroom without having to worry about debt. I want to get my money right first. And going back to school would mean going further in to debt.

The job has been great, though. The funny thing was that after going on more than ten unsuccessful interviews, this was going to be my last application. So I guess it was fate?